In honour of all the outrageous and blatantly unaffordable tuition fees being charged for currently advertised art courses, MAs, PhDs, and summer schools, and in honour of all the potential artists and other creative people who won’t ever be able to afford them, I present Common People by Pulp. This mordant story about meeting a rich and very thick girl slumming it at art college is almost twenty years old, but even more depressing than time’s habit of passing ever more rapidly as one ages is the fact that not only have things not got any better since 1996 but they’ve actually got worse. Probably the likes of Jarvis Cocker (or myself) would have even less chance of getting anywhere near any form of higher education than we did in the 1980s and 1990s. The rich, very thick girls reign over all now. There was an article in The…

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